Growing up, we begin to realize that not all friendships are the same. In high school and college, this becomes even clearer as friendships are constantly evolving. It’s essential to understand where different people belong in your life because not every friend fits into every category. Recognizing these distinctions helps us set boundaries and keep our inner circle filled with people who genuinely uplift us, and not letting those out of the inner circle disappoint us. Here’s a breakdown of three main types of connections: your community, your fun friends, and your inner circle.
1. Your Community: The Familiar Faces
More essential then you realise: Think of your community as the broader group of people you know, like classmates, club members, coworkers, and neighbors. These are people you see often but don’t necessarily have deep connections with. They add value to your life, giving you a sense of belonging, familiarity, and social variety. You might chat with them at events, or maybe you work together on projects. However, you aren’t reliant on them for emotional support. The key here is maintaining positive connections without high expectations. My school and work friends make my life 10000x better, and I am so grateful to have made connections with them, challenge yourself and try to do the same.
2. Fun Friends: Great for Good Times
Fun friends are the ones you love hanging out with, but your relationship doesn’t go much deeper than shared experiences and laughter. They’re the ones you call for a night out, road trips, or spontaneous adventures. However, they might not be the friends you turn to when you’re struggling. Knowing where fun friends stand in your life is essential—they’re here for good times, not necessarily the hard times. And that’s okay! It’s perfectly healthy to have friends that bring joy and adventure without expecting them to fulfill a deeper role. Knowing where these friendships stand is what has helped me so much as I grew in college, less pressure on these relationships, keeps them longer lasting without unnecessary disappointment.
3. Inner Circle: The Heart of Your Support System
Your inner circle is made up of people you can truly rely on. They are the friends who stand by you through ups and downs, inspire you, and genuinely care about your growth. They’re the ones you can trust with your secrets, lean on in tough times, and celebrate life’s successes with. This group is typically smaller but much more meaningful. As we grow, it’s important to keep this circle filled with people who bring positivity, encourage you to be your best self, and consistently lift you up. Inner circle friendships are built on trust, respect, and mutual support.
How to Decide Who Belongs Where
- Evaluate Their Impact on Your Life: Ask yourself if this person brings more positivity or negativity. If their presence is more draining than supportive, they may be better suited as a fun friend rather than a close confidant.
- Set Boundaries: Recognize what you’re willing to share and invest in each type of friendship. Not everyone needs to know everything about you, and that’s okay!
- Accept Natural Shifts: Friendships change, and so do we. People who were once part of your inner circle may shift to the fun friend category, and new people may move closer. Embrace these changes without guilt.
Growing up, our relationships evolve, and that’s a natural part of life. By understanding who belongs in your community, who’s there for fun, and who’s in your inner circle, you can create a balanced social life filled with the right people in the right places.
